Rick James would call him, "The New Lawd of Darkness!"

If the NFL was Star Wars, Randy Moss would be Darth Vader.

He is crass, arrogant and disrespectful. "What's 40G's to me?!?!", Randy was video taped saying to reporters after he was fined for bum rushing the field-goal post in the playoffs against the Packers. He was only paying homage to a friend that danced like that and mooned the crowd because that's what the Green Bay fans do to visiting teams when their leaving on the bus. I'll make all the excuses for him myself. Even if they need to be made up.

The reason, as Tony Montana so eloquently put, "You need people like him, to make yourselves feel bettah." The NFL is all about entertainment and what is more entertaining than a young man who loves to smoke weed, makes millions of dollars, has no respect for the game, yet can make you howl in delight when he makes a spectacular catch for a touchdown.

You know a new touchdown dance is coming. It won't be in the first game of the season, but the game after that a forewarned Al Davis is going to watch Randy score a touchdown, spike the ball and take a dump right in the middle of the endzone. When Randy finishes he'll look around and scream, "Somebody get me some T.P., I got the mud-butt."

I love Randy Moss. Just for the shear fact that if I got the chance, I would love to buck the conglomerate NFL system too. What can you do to a person who is bringing in ticket sales. Trade me I guess. Of course, I wouldn't be that person because that isn't me. But is sure is nice to fantasize about.

Randy Moss is coming to New England for the first game of the NFL season this year, and I will be there. And there will be no dumps allowed in the endzone.